A house, a gathering of people and rooms filled with devious intent played out on personal stages.
That was my first BDSM play party. I had strict instructions to observe. I was not to participate in any way. It was a difficult box to live in since my nature is to watch, break out and jump in.
I wanted to experience, feel, throw the tails and taste the whip.
So much soaked in. So much…
The party ended. A whole Lifestyle began. All that I knew I was became valid.
“AN unusual sex survey has found that Australians who enjoy bondage and discipline are not damaged or dangerous, and might even be happier than those who practise “normal” sex.”
Not that we needed a survey to tell us this (sexual repression just pisses me off). But it’s nice to see some actual research pushing the perceptions.
Fetish. Have to love a good, wholesome fetish. But what’s a Kink to do when they’re favorite garments need care? Well…we turn to our friendly Internet for help!
Oh, there I stood. Captain of my ship. Master of all things! I held the ropes and steered my …
…right.
I speak of a fun scene I tested out this past weekend.
Seemingly simple. In reality? Not so much.
This is part of the fun involved in creating and taking risks. My sub for that scene was marvelous (and her partner most generous). Even though bits and pieces fell to chaos, it was a blast and her feedback gave me the fuel needed to refine.
New knots, new clips, a slightly different layout for the ropework.
For me this isn’t about perfection…it’s about expanding knowledge, experience and adding moments.
And, of course, it’s about having fun – if that ever stops, then it will be time for me to quit.
We are machines of organic grace and fluid beauty. How our lesser pieces work quietly in their dark, warm places for years without failing more often is a question we hope never receives an answer. They just do their jobs. We just put them through their routines without a lingering thought.
It’s a truce between physics, nature, supernatural and dumb luck.
Perched dumbly atop this machine is a curious knob designed to protect the most mysterious bit of wetwork we hold. The brain fires relentlessly. Our skin responds. Outside the world tides ebb and flow against us all. Most of the time we ignore it. Sometimes we feel it and the brain lightning shoots strong, loud commands across the bow.
Tension builds.
Tension breaks.
In me this tension breaks many ways. The most pleasant are those which involve losing myself inside of moments stretched between breaths and movement. Cracking a valve open in some greater dark long enough to vent out and pull in the cold that comes from rare habitat.
When I’m very, very fortunate, there’s enough time for my eyes to adjust and capture landscape…scenery. Shadows gain resolution beyond simple dark form. I see the eyes of others, their faces, their bodies bearing marks. My ears attune to a language so close to what I would normally hear but often is just below the threshold. Stories are told through every sense. Senses merge. The merge becomes a conduit. Energy is transferred back and forth through a union that’s not always physical.
Eventually the landscape fades and the union is buried beneath the weight of a world gone real. It’s okay. I carry the peace and pieces of that place within and until I’m there again?
This weekend another paddle buried in the piled shelves of discarded sporting goods. Happy people were painted on one side, a rubberized grip, shaped like a ping-pong racquet but made for paddle ball. It’s light, broad, round and slow. This thing made more noise than pain and would likely break easily.
One Dollar Paddle
Obviously a bit of modification was in order.
Once home I drilled 5 1/8″ holes into it’s center (a nice star pattern). Tonight I will sand it down and lacquer it.
For a grand total of $1 + tax? A wonderful “punishment” paddle shall be born.
Something about regular Play Parties is the planning.
Considerations:
Am I DM’ing this time?
What have I seen that I really want to try.
Where should the bulk of my time be spent? As a spectator? As a player? Split?
Do I need to give attention to anyone?
Usually I spend a lot of time planning out various scenes. If I know I cannot do them myself I’ll arrange another person to work my sub with. If I lose interest in the scene, I’ll make sure to pass it on. If it looks like something that would be a better photo shoot, I’ll put it off as a Studio Scene.
Some scenes get me very excited. I know not all scenes will work with every sub, so I’ll immediately begin looking for “the right sub” as I’m planning the logistics. Since I tend to be very patient and negotiate thoroughly, I take my time finding the right submissive. I do tend to make my scenes somewhat extreme. I will not put someone in a situation that’s above their heads and above their thresholds; that combination is a bit too dangerous in dynamic environment.
Gather:
Supplies – What do I need that I don’t have?
Inspect – Are the supplies I have in good shape and clean?
Knowledge/Experience – Do I know enough to pull this off? Am I confident? What does my gut tell me?
I know enough people in this Lifestyle to just ask. If I don’t know something or if I am hesitant…I ask and learn. I will not put my sub or myself in danger because of ego.
Help – Again, if I need help in any way…I ask.
Location is not a problem, neither is equipment…but never take it for granted. Inspect you play area – every time!
I try to maintain open communications with all parties as the scene approaches. We plan, we add, we take away, we communicate! It all enhances the experience. It is awesome and it makes a wonderful energy.
Sometimes all of this takes place in minutes…mere minutes (with the exception of Negotiation – that takes longer).
What do some of you put together when planning scenes?
Not so very long ago I decided to cave. I fell on my leather glove fetish, sought the advice of fellow kinks and swiped plastic towards a purchase.
Ohhhh…the Man Glove fetish has joined me with desires both strong and nasty.
I love wearing them. I love the grip.
Put the leather to flesh and it goes insane. Grapple flesh. wrestle skin. Squeeze, pinch, slap and spank. Hold them down. pull them in – probe and use through the tight skin of leather.
I’ve started down this road called “Constructing your own paddles” since I’m an Impact geek. A few people have asked me about making these delightful toys…so I oblige!
I have 4 paddles in my bag. 2 of them are custom hardwoods made by a friend who designs VERY high-end custom furniture. He created the paddles to suit my constant pestering and his own needs. I don’t know exactly what wood they’re made from, but they are light, strong and very well crafted. The handles are formed perfectly to be comfortable for extended use. One of the paddles is double-ended (I’ll post a pic later). The other is a hairbrush design…many can attest to it’s bite.
I was missing a traditional Frat Paddle…so I made one! I used the handle design from my other paddles, modified it to my hand and measured it out to fit my arm. Once I found a suitable piece of half-inch maple, I went to work.
The new paddle
It’s heavy. It’s evil…(again, pictures coming soon) and the marks it leaves? Hehehehe…incredible.
Frat Paddle Marks
The fourth paddle is a Thrift Shop find of DarlingEvil’s. The words “Black Beauty” leer from its face. This thing must be an ancient squash racket…it strikes fear in everyone who’s about to feel it.
Now, how to make a paddle? Well, start with something simple and someone who knows their stuff! Here’s what I suggest:
Canoe Paddles are a blast to use and they’re easy to make. This book has many designs to get you started on a path to evil. I cannot recommend it enough! At $17, it’s a good investment.
